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Your Brain on Love: From Lust to True Partnership with Jillian Turecki

Jillian Turecki is a renowned relationship coach, teacher, author, and host of the Podcast, Jillian On Love. Fueled by an insatiable curiosity about what makes a relationship thrive, Jillian has helped thousands over the last 20 years through her teachings, courses, and writing to revolutionize their relationship with themselves so that they transform their romantic relationships. Jillian is sought out for her compassionate, direct, and very authentic style of coaching, teaching and writing.


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What if the key to extraordinary relationships isn’t about finding the right person but becoming the right person?

The idea of finding your one true love is a romantic notion that runs deep in popular culture. Movies, books, songs, and poems have been written over the centuries expressing the very human need for love and connection. But the truth is before you can open yourself up to love someone else, you have to understand and love yourself, first.

Our guest today is going to help you unlock not just better relationships, but a better understanding of yourself. Jillian Turkecki is a renowned relationship coach. She’s the author of the book, It Begins with You: The 9 Hard Truths About Love that Will Change Your Life. And she’s here to help you understand how to repair the relationship with yourself so that you can build the rewarding relationships you deserve.

The truth is that you are the common denominator in every relationship you’ll ever be in. When you focus on your self-esteem first, you walk away with a better relationship with yourself and with others. Love starts with you. Listen in as Jillian shares some life-changing truths that will help you rewire how you think about love, connection, intimacy, and personal growth.

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"Jillian Turecki"

It’s not enough that you’re a good person. You actually need skills to be in a healthy relationship.

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**This week’s show notes are taken from the video — enjoy!**

  • This is what inspired Jillian to write a book exploring the dynamic between personal well-being and relationships. [2:23]
  • Jillian’s obsession with understanding what makes a relationship work stemmed from needing to understand this very personal experience. [5:02]
  • Why is self-compassion so pivotal to mental and emotional health? Jillian explains. [8:45]
  • Most of the mistakes and decisions you make in a relationship all stem from this core fear. [11:06]
  • What causes you to be attracted to one person but not another? The answer might surprise you. [12:49]
  • For women, this might influence who you find attractive. [15:28]
  • Is it lust or love? This might help you understand which drive is at play. [17:57]
  • If you’re going through a break-up, Jillian’s advice might help. [22:38]
  • This might help you if you’re in a relationship with someone struggling with their mental or physical health. [25:53]
  • These are some common barriers that hold people back from doing self-work. [28:21]
  • You can do this today and begin initiating positive change in your life. [32:07]
  • This is what Jillian is excited about right now. [34:00]
  • Take a screenshot, tag us (@jimkwik & @jillianturecki), and share your biggest takeaway from this episode.
  • If you want to connect with Jillian, you can visit her website, here.
  • Don’t forget to grab a copy of her book, here.

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